Can I get a 1/2lb of Turkey!

Dating is like being at a deli counter. You get up to the line, place your order which is carefully thrown to you and the guy turns around immediately and says NEXT! I feel like the man behind the deli counter...which leads me back to my first date of venture. His name is Kirk. Suddenly I know you are thinking of Star trek aren't you.....hehehhe...

Kirk has an attitude. His humor is slapstick on the border line of sarcastic. Yet he much better at dishing it than taking it. He also have an attitude when it comes to women I discovered. In fact, I didn't even want to go on the date with him. I had gotten this vibe the night before the date( we were talking on the phone.) The next morning I emailed and asked him if he really wanted to meet - he called me crazy but the certifiable kind not a good crazy. He said I was paranoid and of course he wanted to meet. Funny thing is I was right on! Although he was nice enough and all, he didn't want to be there but dinner was good. We went for Sushi - this great place in Brookline. Our conversation flowed but I kept reeling him back in as he over and over again bashed woman. I am thinking bad experiences that he has never forgotten. Our issues, his mother lives with him because he is a 3/4 of the time Dad. He was trapped by the evil forces of a woman who wanted to get married. She never got the ring and he got the kid. So Mom moved in to help and the story goes from there. I asked him why he joined and he said a friend told him too....hello, do you have a brain and can you think for yourself. I will be nice as he was a least decent. He did call to make sure I made it home safely that night. One more call after that and we were done. Ba Bye....don't forget to throw your trash in the receptacles (with the pageant wave) - think Toy Story 2 trailers and then you can completely understand where I am.


NEXT!

Tim - the horrific one. Did you ever go on a date thinking you were on a interview for the job of your life instead? Well here is Tim's story. By the way, Tim has a great voice. He should be in communications expect he doesn't know how to effectively communicate with anyone!

Tim and I met for lunch after going through the rigorous process that eharmony commands. We meet in town on a warm fall day! He takes me to this quaint little bistro in the South End. Our conversation is seamless although its a little loud and sometimes I couldn't hear what he was saying and my lip reading skills aren't up to par. Needless to say a few hours later we leave the restaurant and go for a walk. No hand holding or anything like that but we are walking side by side immersed in conversation. He is fairly serious and I am trying to lighten him up. Imagine that me trying to lighten someone else up. Now that is ironic! He walks me to my car, we say our goodbyes, thank you's and so forth. All and all, it felt like a pretty decent date. But here comes the good part ( depending on how you look at it.)

The next evening I get a call from Horrific Tim stating that he treated the date like an interview and I did not make the first cut. In fact, I did not make it in the looks department. Being absolutely floored that someone could be so hurtful, I said nothing but okay, have a great life. ( I was always taught that two wrongs don't make a right.) Needless to say, I have not spoken with Tim since that fateful day and nor do I want too. Like the previous two, I can recommend a great shrink!

NEXT!

Phil - aka Morta Man, aka, Physical Phil, aka Fast Phil! He is a funeral director for a family business. Well part of the time, he is trying to discover the world of commercial real estate wanting so desperately to be a billionaire. At first, I didn't want to meet him. I couldn't put my finger on it but I was reluctant. But through the persuasion of friends, I did and I was surprised that I enjoyed his company! Ohhh.... phones ringing, more later on Morta Man!